Robyn Dykstra, From Playboy Bunny to Bible Teacher | COMPASS in the Storm Ep 2

Full Transcript

Transcribed from the episode audio. Names, places, scripture references and medical terms have been corrected, and caption noise has been removed. Speaker names are not marked, because the source captions marked only that the speaker changed and not who was talking. Paragraph breaks follow those speaker changes.

My guest today went from being a Playboy Bunny to delivering lifechanging messages about Jesus to thousands. Stay tuned for her inspiring story of hope. Hi, I’m Lana Bach, your host on COMPASS in the Storm, where we feature real life stories of people who have survived the toughest season of their lives, God’s Way. And I’m excited to welcome my special guest today and one of my very first guest on this podcast, Robyn Dykstra. Thank you, Robyn, for being here today.

What a treat to be with you, Lana. Gosh, this is fun.

It is. I’ve been so excited about this particular interview. My friend Robyn holds a special place in my heart. she’s an author of multiple books, including the book titled The Widow Wore Pink. She’s a speaker, a Bible teacher, and she also helps women learn how to share their testimonies through her 13-week program called Christian Speakers Boot Camp. and I was one of her many hundreds of students and thank you Robyn for your investment in me and I’m always open to your critique anytime. You have done wonders with me and so many other women and we will give more details on that later in the podcast and links so you can look up that boot camp. But Robyn, when you were younger, you had to make some hard choices. And one of them led you to become a Playboy Bunny, which that alone is intriguing and so very interesting, and I loved reading about that adventure in your book, but also you were widowed not just once, but twice along with other unimaginable events backto back. So, Robyn, tell us what was that journey like for you? And I’m really curious, was there a pivoting event that changed everything?

The pivoting event was saying yes to Jesus. You know, I grew up in a home that didn’t recognize Jesus, didn’t talk about God, vague references to superior beings. So, it really wasn’t until I was an adult and had tried everything else to feel as good on the inside as I looked on the outside that I found church. And these lovely group of ladies took me on like a project and never made me feel like one. But I think so that’s always the pivotal. I think what was so bless what was so such a blessing for me even though I made such a mess of my life before I found Jesus was that I didn’t learn things wrong. Like I didn’t have a lot of false teaching. I wandered into a terrific Bible-based church with women who were grounded and read the word for themselves and taught me how to pray and understand who I was, who God was. So, that was really helpful. So, that when ugly stuff started happening, we had a well, when Jay died, my husband, he was 39 years old. We had two kids, seven and four. I was the first one in my circle. I mean, aren’t old ladies supposed to bury their husbands? I just was not the way I pictured things. But because I hadn’t been false taught,

I knew I didn’t have to pay back what was already paid in full. Jay’s decision not to quit smoking, his free will, he caused a heart attack.

He died. So, his free will kind of fell on me. But it wasn’t because of the things that I had done as a Playboy bunny. It it God wasn’t punishing me for my past. And I think knowing that truth, having that having that grounding, knowing that God loves me and that he forgave me for all the stuff that I did. That was really a godsend because when even the day Jay died, I can remember thinking, “This is stinko.” I might have used stronger language than that, but I didn’t like it. But the Lord was so gracious and he said, you know, it just kind of whispered into my soul. You know, there’s lots of people who God talks to you in a lot of different ways, but for me, it just sort of drops ideas that kind of traipse across the backyard of my brain. And I just I just kind of heard, you know, I don’t I know you don’t like this, but if you trust me, it’ll be okay. I’ll be with you and you’re going to be okay. And some version of that and he was I mean just that peace and you probably know this being a pastor’s wife and talking to so many people and having some icky stuff happen in your life. That peace that surpasses understanding that just fell on me like a warm fuzzy blanket. And it was so good. It was like he was with me. But then he activated all these women in my church who came and prayed and dropped off chicken salad and took my kids out to the circus. I mean, he was with me in his presence, but he was with me in his people. And knowing that I could go to the front of the widows and fatherless line. That was just so that was so helpful not to have this psychic debris about, oh, maybe he’s mad at me. He’s not mad at me. He he just he let He let Jay’s free will fall on me. And you know, except for Jay dying, this is going to sound so weird. Maybe you’ll get this. But except for Jay dying, it was a really good experience. When you have nowhere else to turn except the face of God, he is faithful

and comforter and friend and director and counselor and guider and provider, you know, he just

Yes,

it was it was it was except for Jay dying. Like I say, it was a mountaintop experience. And actually when I started to heal and life kind of returned to normal, I honestly missed that closeness that we had. Did do you understand what I mean?

I do. I do.

Yeah,

I do. And Robyn, you know, that was just one of the numerous storms throughout your life. But thank the Lord, that’s what the trigger was. And and the Lord doesn’t promise believers a smooth life. If you know, Acts 4, when Paul’s talking to the disciples, he tells them, hey, remain steadfast in the Lord. But then he goes on to tell them, hey, look, you know what, you guys, you’re going to have to go through hardships to enter the kingdom of God. And so, and we all will have to go through hardships, but you certainly have been through your share. And despite these obstacles that were in your life, these these events, I observe your life, Robyn, and how God is using you today. And I have to ask, what is the one thing that you would describe as your compass in navigating that life storm? What was the one thing that helped you to get where you are today? I would say discipleship. I think I think it’s really important. I believe that you should always be following somebody who knows more than you.

Whether that’s a Bible study teacher or a pastor or somebody on a podcast. I don’t know. But you got to be chasing after somebody who knows more than you. And then you got to turn around and go, “Hey, come with me and let me teach you what I just learned here.”

Being in that being part of that chain, that was critical for me

because I had people that I could rely on to say, “I don’t know what to do with this. I’ve never been a single mom before. I’ve never I don’t know how to what to do with the car or the house or the whatever. And just knowing that their faith was so strong emboldened me to be able to,

you know, after healing a little, you know, but to be a beacon of hope and help for other people. So being that compass, knowing where your true north is, let’s just keep using that. My true north was the women in the Bible study class who were teaching me so that I could lean on them. And because when you because it’s easy to lose your footing.

It’s easy to get turned around without a compass. You don’t know what you know there’s stories about people who just walk in circles in the forest.

But without having that compass, it’s easy to get distracted. I you know I’ I’ve been discipling women for 30 years now and

what I see is when they don’t have this discipleship relationship that they turn to a little bit of wine or a little blue pill or an inappropriate relationship because I don’t know for me I just if I hadn’t had them it would have been really tempting to do some pretty dumb things

because I was so desperate.

that phrase, I just want my life back.

Yes.

I just want my life back. And if I can’t have my life back, then how can I replicate the feeling of it? Well, that’s a that’s a dangerous place. So without accountability and people checking in on me and praying for me, that would have been that would have been bad.

Yeah. Well, that absolutely vital vital advice. I appreciate that, Robyn. And I was as I was preparing for this podcast, I was going through some of my notes about your book and I started laughing because

honestly, Louise and Helen, weren’t those the two that were in your very first Bible study? And I thought, “Oh, I would have loved to have, you know, Louise and Helen on with Robyn and kind of get an idea of what their take was when you first went in because I know that Bible study really changed your life a lot.” And I appreciate you sharing that because that’s so vital. And you endured those these all the things that went on in your life. And I love in chapter 11 you end one of the things you end with in your book is you said when your life falls apart they put you under a microscope to see how big your God really is. And Robyn that’s so true because our life is preaching without words. And so you bringing along somebody else that is so vital. We learn and then we bring along somebody else. God is so good. And I know since then you’ve remarried the man you call Mr. Forever. He is so supportive of you and a super guy. And I just want to maybe as a listener say this. Is it true that he made you wait for your first kiss until after you were married?

For real? Who does that? Dave this honestly when he said we’re you know I we aren’t going to kiss until we get married. I thought kiss was, you know, wink wink for something else. No, it was kissing. He kept us so pure. And I’m glad he did because I am able to share that story. And you know, he just again

walking in integrity with the principles in the Bible that make your life better. He we were set up to win. We did a lot of talking because I’ll tell you what, when you start kissing, you stop talking. And if you start dating, I want you to remember this that when you start kissing, you stop talking. And Dave kept us talking.

Yes. Yes. And that’s awesome. I think that’s awesome. That is so cool. So, okay, Robyn, I know there’s got to be someone listening to this podcast thinking, “Well, that’s great for Robyn. That all in her h in her life. that’s that all she messed up and you know God helped her but I don’t feel there’s hope for me and I’m sure there’s something that you would want to say or share that would help that person who’s experiencing those emotions right now. Yeah, it’s so true because there’s there’s good and evil

and there’s God who loves us and wants good things for us and then there’s the enemy of our soul who is not equal to God but super super effective at

discouraging and distracting and detouring us and keeping us from living the life that we want. And so whenever God offers something good, you know, like hope or a friendship or a compass point at some place, there’s always going to be the opportunity for the enemy of our soul to come in and say, “That won’t work. You should trust me.” So I think what’s really important to remember is you got to listen to the right voice.

You just have to listen to the right voice that there is a God in heaven who loves you to the moon and back. That’s what he says in Psalm 103. And he wants good things for you. And yes, 1 Peter 4:12 says, “Don’t be surprised when bad things happen because this is the world that we live in.” But he greater is he who is in you and around you than he is against you. I just trust him. And what I would say is get yourself quiet. Turn everything off. Just sit with your just sit in a quiet place and just say, “God, if you’re real, tell me.”

And just wait and see. Do you get a tingle? Do you get a voice in your head? Does something traipse across the backyard of your brain? Is there a breeze that brushes against your cheek like a kiss? What? What will God reveal himself to you and he is all about that.

Yes. Amen. Amen. you know, your ministry speaks to so many that it’s never too late to start again with the Lord. And and thank you, Robyn. God’s transforming power rings true in your life. And and I highly recommend our listeners to get Robyn’s book titled W the Widow Wore Pink because she tells her full life Thank you, Robyn. She tells her full life story and folks, it keeps you on the edge of your seat. Trust me. Excellent book. And I think Robyn, they can get it on Amazon, any bookstore, and also your website. Sure.

robyndykstra.com.

Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah.

Yes. And we will put a link in the in the podcast as well. And I also want to let your listen our listeners know that they can get more information about your Christian speakers. So you want to share a little bit about that?

Yeah, Christian speakers boot camp. I help active and aspiring speakers tell their story and teach the Bible in a way that honors the Lord that doesn’t make it all about the speaker, but shows what showcases what God did in your life. That’s what we do. And then of course, how to find places to speak and if you want to get paid for it, how to negotiate those conversations. So, it’s the whole how to start and grow a speaking ministry.

Yes. Yes. And and actually just to give a plug there, I don’t know that I’d be doing a podcast right now if you hadn’t taught me some of the things I learned in your in your boot camp. So

Well, that’s good to know. Good is Yes, it is. And I know Robyn and Dave travels with you a lot of the time, but you’re out speaking most weeks of the year at various events, including conferences, retreats, churches, and lunchons. And you bring an amazing message wherever you go. I’ve had the privilege of personally hearing you speak and I want to say to any ministry leader and any event planner that’s listening with Robyn as your keynote speaker, you will not be disappointed. and I know they can probably contact you through your website robyndykstra.com and again we’ll put this in the podcast so that they’ll have it. But I want to thank you again Robyn. Is there anything you want to share additional to the speaking or to the boot camp or to your book or anything at all?

Thank you. Yeah, I love sharing my story on the page, but I really love sharing this story on stage and inspiring women because when they hear like when audiences hear that God still took me, there’s no question in their minds that he is for them, too. I’m a good little evangelist.

Yes, you are. Yes, you are. And I want to thank you again, Robyn, for being my guest today. Your testimony of God’s faithfulness in the face of desperate circumstances gives us hope. And also, Robyn, thank you for all you’re doing to help women like me even find the path to their ministry. And God bless you and God bless Dave, too.

Thank you, Lana. Such a treat to be with you. and see you walking in faith and doing the thing that God has called you to do.

God is good and I thank you. Thank you, Robyn.

All right, talk soon. I trust you received hope and encouragement from my guest today, Robyn Dykstra. But maybe you’re listening right now and you can relate to Robyn’s story. As she says, perhaps you’ve experienced a sudden and unexpected event. Maybe the loss of a loved one, an unwanted divorce, fatal health diagnosis, job loss, financial collapse. Your world might be forever changed and your dreams seem crushed forever. And sometimes there is no coming back for some of these sudden events. Questions flood your mind and all you want is your life back. But there’s good news. When you learn to trust God, he brings peace into your storm. I’d like to leave you with a scripture to remind you that God loves you and he will help you get through your storm. Jeremiah 29:11 says, “For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord, plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.” And Lord, I pray you help us always remember that you have great plans for us. Plans of hope and future. And Lord, I pray you touch that one who is hurting so badly and is so broken and bring new hope and life into their spirit. Help them remember that you walk with them through their storm and they can trust in your unfailing love for them. I ask it in Jesus’ name. Amen. Trust in his unfailing love for you, my friend. And thank you for joining me today. You won’t want to miss the next COMPASS in the Storm with my guest and awardwinning author Valerie Juillerat. Her faith was tested like never before as she watched her dreams slip away and battled the darkness that tried to consume her life. Spoiler alert, she wins. See you then. Remember to stay the course and God bless you.